a study of the soul:
Anonymous asked: I dont have a blog anymore but i still check up on your writing often. Im so glad you gave this website a chance and i'd be so sad if you left.

oh man i’ve been on this goddamn site for too long / all good things must come to an end and all that jazz but i’m here to stay for now so there’s no need for sadness :~)

September 2, 2014
4 notes
filed under: (but like if i'm still here by the time i'm 25 hold an intervention for me PLEASE)
polariodpictureprincess asked: You should write a book.

all in good time, my love.

2014: august

august was finding
a certain kind of truth
hidden under the blanket
of loneliness. 
i can no longer see
the girl in the mirror
or the ghost who lives
behind me. 
i have lost all traces of
evidence that proves
i exist. 

(a.y)

September 2, 2014
116 notes
filed under: (my writing)(2014)

EVERYTHING IS MOVING FAST AND I’M STILL TRYING TO LEARN HOW TO BE A BETTER HUMAN BEING

September 1, 2014
514 notes
filed under: (like hello september but also no thanks)(bc that means i am almost two months away from turning 19)(and idk how i feel bout that)(u feel)(anthea)
Anonymous asked: Can you post the large version of your icon? :)

YOU’RE MY PERSON. I NEED YOU ALIVE. YOU MAKE ME BRAVE.

August 31, 2014
113 notes
filed under: (I FINALLY WATCHED THE SEASON 10 FINALE OF GREYS)(I AM SO NOT OKAY)(ME AND YANG ARE THE SAME)((literally name-wise))(grey's anatomy)
emesmyra asked: I thank heavens that somehow I landed on your blog. For someone who's 18, your pieces astound me. You are fantastic. I hope you succeed in life and maybe some day, I will purchase a book that has your name on it :) Stay golden

It’s 2:15AM and i’m just about to crash into my bed and sleep for a day or two but i’m definitely going to fall asleep with the biggest smile on my face because of you!! I still have A TON of learning to do and most days i am filled with self-doubt but it warms my world up to know that you associate my works with the word “astound(ing)”. Ah thank you my love!! Stay safe and goodnight ok :-)

August 31, 2014
7 notes
filed under: (ask)(emesmyra)

2wentysixletters:

Typewriter Series #77

I heard that more than
ninety percent of the ocean
remains undiscovered,
so maybe that’s
where I am.
Maybe that’s where
I’ll find myself.

A.Y // who are you? (i don’t know)
August 29, 2014
5,894 notes
filed under: (GOOD MORNING)

ologyjournal:

Thank you, -Ology Collective, for all of your submissions! We are still seeking writing of any type (short fiction, prose, poetry, even novel snippets) and we have much excitement to share with all of you. 

From our editors to you: thank you!

August 27, 2014
32 notes
filed under: (hey pals)(ology journal)

1. You eat regret for breakfast.
Wash it down with a cup of coffee, two sugars.
It sits heavy in your stomach like the
stones you used to skip across the lake in the summer
with the boy who made you realise how
important chemistry is.
Skin on skin
creating sparks of electricity.
Enough to light up a Christmas tree,
a home made for two,
an entire street,
your eyes.

2. You spent the whole of tenth grade chemistry
trying to figure out how this could be.
You held hands with your lab partner for
one minute to see if you could replicate that
moment of current in your veins.
You’d brush shoulders with strangers,
kiss boys underneath the stairs
but it was never enough to create
goosebumps on your skin.

3. The lunch lady serves you regret for lunch
and she looks at you like she knows.
The pebbles from breakfast still sit
in your stomach so you only eat half of it.
The other half finds home in the trash can.
The stones are heavy.
The stones are piling up.
The stones are sinking you to the bottom of the lake.

4. The lake where you first felt
goosebumps on your heart and he kept it warm
in the inner pocket of his jacket.
He held it as if it would crumble.
By the body of water that had a bed of drowning rocks
he kissed you as if death was lurking behind him.
You dropped all your pebbles and
filled your fists with his shirt instead.
You emptied your mind and
filled it with the colour of his eyes instead.

5. Three years ago
you both swallowed pills of empty promises
and walked away from the lake, from each other.
A road trip of silence back to a home that
reeked of memories that didn’t involve each other.
That same year, the lake dried up
and all that was left was a pile of rocks
covered in fingerprints that would
all lead back to you and him.

6. This morning he wakes up and
searches for the jacket he wore that
particular summer.
He finds it shoved behind football boots and gym bags.
All that is left is a gum wrapper and remnants of a pebble.
He puts the jacket back.
He walks into the kitchen.
He pours himself a bowl of stale cereal.
He eats regret for breakfast, too.

A.Y // nothing fills you up like regret does (via 2wentysixletters)
August 27, 2014
1,922 notes
filed under: (:~))
Anonymous asked: Typewriter Series number #82 has been my absolute favorite since you shared it with me, I have it saved as a picture in my phone, scrawled it out on a piece of notebook paper pinned to my wall, and even want it tattooed. It, you have saved my life :)

i don’t think i’m ever going to be able to come to a point in my life where messages like these don’t leave me absolutely without words. i hope you’ve found your place. thank you / i love you. 

August 27, 2014
11 notes
filed under: (ask)(anonymous)

Alt-J // Hunger Of The Pine

August 26, 2014
70 notes
filed under: (i have been thinking about this music video a lot)(alt j)(hunger of the pine)(music)
This is what silence sounds like:
Muffled cries and your heart
thumping against your rib cage.
A tap dripping.
Waves against the shore.
Your lungs keeping you alive
exhaling clouds on to my skin to create
goosebumps.
When you lift seashell up to your ear
it’s not the sound of the ocean you’re hearing.
It’s the echoes of the inside
of your mind.
This is what silence looks like:
Heartbreak.
You disappearing before me and
the whole world stopping to look for you.
Your palm against mine
our fault lines grazing against each other.
A silhouette against a white wall.
Secrets hidden within myself.
Anything that is half way through falling.
May it be a rain drop from a cloud
a leaf leaving it’s nest
a young girl falling down the rabbit hole
for the very first time.

A.Y // this is silence (via 2wentysixletters)
August 26, 2014
567 notes
filed under: (:-))

2wentysixletters:

Typewriter Series #82

August 26, 2014
8,179 notes
filed under: (ah seriously one of my fav pieces ive ever written)
(n.b.)